This issue with this trip came with the planning. I've never been a planner and don't anticipate much about trips as reality never lives up to the fantasy. But even I'll admit that this one could have been better executed.
For one thing, I didn't buy my guidebook until the day before the trip. My last two books for Hawaii were written by the same dude, a local with a very laid back style who's done everything and seen everything twice. Because I didn't order the book from Amazon like I'd planned, I ended up with a Fodor's guide that I barely consulted. If I had, I might have done a better job at booking this trip.
Traveler's Tip #1: If you're going to stay on the west coast of the Big Island, make sure you fly into Kona Airport. Hilo Airport is only for people staying to the south or on the east coast.
Guess which airport I flew into? Yep, I was scheduled to fly into Hilo despite my hotel being in Kailua-Kona on the west coast. I didn't realize my mistake until a couple of days before leaving when I tried to map out the hotel. I thought Mapquest had made a mistake. Or maybe I'd put in the wrong address. It just couldn't be a 2 1/2 drive to get to the hotel from the airport. Had to be a mistake. Right?
I'm an idiot.
Once I figured out this crucial info, I tried to change the flight but decided it would cost to much money. I had already reserved a car and I figured that it's an island -- how bad could it be?
And a cheap idiot at that.
Travelling to Hawaii is already a pain in the butt and by far the worst part of any vacation there. I joke that I only go out to the islands every five years because it takes me that long to forget the plane rides. And while, yes, I will be returning (Kauai next time), I'll definitely need the full five years to forget this ordeal.
The flights themselves weren't so bad this trip. A 5 hour flight to LAX, a 6 hour flight to Honolulu, and then a 45 minute flight to Hilo. Still not enough leg room but I was pleased to find that Delta now has Wi-Fi and USB connections on their longer flights. As I've been addicted to my tablet for the last few years, this was a great option to have. I had a brief bout of pressure sickness on the LAX-Honolulu leg but I wasn't exactly surprised (this is the third time I've gotten sick while flying over the west coast -- what's up with that). There was also a baby sitting in front of me but she only fussed once during the flight. The rest of the time she was just looking around at everyone and being adorable. Just how I like babies: cute and quiet.
Flight got into Hilo at 8:00 just as the sun went down. Now for the real fun. I picked up my white Chevy Cruze from Avis and set out for the hotel. Already tired from the flights, I got turned around before finally asking for directions to Saddle Road. It cuts right through the middle of the island from east to west coast and at the time seemed like the logical, shorter route to my destination.
Ye gods, I'm an idiot.
Traveler's Tip #2: When travelling to the Big Island, STAY OFF SADDLE ROAD.
For those of you not in the know, Saddle Road is rather infamous on the Big Island. It passes between two of the islands big volcanoes, Mauna Loa and Mauna Kea and for the longest time was known to be a complete mess. Pock-marked and barely paved, only locals who knew the road and had 4WD would even dare to get on it. I can tell you that it is not as bad as it used to be. But it's still bad.
The road passes by a lot of residences at first, making it slow going out of Hilo. I initially thought this was the reason it would take so long but ... no. The speed limit changes frequently throughout the trip, from 25 mph up to 60 mph in some parts depending on the curves. Sometimes there are two lanes, sometimes four. There are obvious signs of improvement as there are construction vehicles everywhere, particularly in one area. Y'know, the roughly two miles somewhere in the middle where the pavement stops completely? Yeah.
Here I am, tired and punchy in a strange car on a strange road at night only to find there is no road anymore and nowhere to turn off or turn around in case I don't want to try this. The road was down to two lanes barely separated by some orange barrels at a speed limit of 20 mph. And some guy actually passed me on this part because apparently I wasn't going fast enough on the unpaved road. At night. And did I mention that it had started to drizzle?
I finally made it through that part and back to the pavement. Soon after the speed limit went back up to 60 mph and I took full advantage of that. The road is incredibly dark and lonely with few road signs, turnoffs or signs of life. I was ready to wet myself with joy when, about 20 years later, I spotted some lights off in the distance. I got past the part where the road was down to one lane (I have no idea how traffic progressed in the other direction -- it's not like there were flagmen on the road at this time of night.) and started to see road signs. But my directions only got me so far. Turns out that the Kahalu'u Road my hotel was on wasn't listed on Mapquest or Google Maps. I passed by the 'road' twice before I spotted it. The reason 'road' is in quotes is because, despite having a green road sign, it's more of a half-paved, rutty driveway to multiple residences than an actual road. As I drove past these homes and up a hill, I kept thinking I'd made another mistake but no. I saw a sign for Big Island Retreat to the right and pulled in.
I was so relieved to be out of the car, I could barely walk. It was 11 pm by this time and I was grateful that I'd made it before the 12 midnight cut-off for check-in. But this bed and breakfast (without the breakfast) was locked up tight. I didn't realize at the time that the doorbell was on the side entrance so I went to the front. I was met shortly by a tiny woman named Gigi who ran the place. She helped me with my bags as I explained my lateness. She took me to the Pineapple Room, a lovely spot towards the front of the house with its own screened-in lanai and set me up with her phone number and Wi-Fi. She expressed some surprise at the sight of my dinosaur of a flip phone ("Even my mom has a better phone than that!" -- Thanks, lady) but I told her about my tablet which is Wi-Fi enabled. She then left me to it, knowing that I was too tired to do anything but take a shower and go to bed. Which is exactly what I did.
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